Unbroken thread

And so it went –
She was here, and then she wasn’t.
She was alive, and then she died.

But no, it wasn’t like that at all.
It happened over time, and is still happening.
She was less and less in this world of dirt and trees,
less and less inside of her body,
and more and more in the everything
that we and the trees are part of.
And then there was that one moment
when she stopped breathing in her body
and she filled the whole room instead.
Her face beamed with joy at her own freedom,
while we washed her and sang to her and laid her body out
beautifully, so that visitors could sit with her smile
and the radiance in the room.
For three days she held court,
much like she did when she was sick,
only happier now.

We could tell she still loved the attention,
the prayers carrying her warmly through her travels.
On the third day, her handmaidens gathered again,
bearing beautiful silks and saris.
We had no instructions but ancient memory,
and she guided us as we taught ourselves
how to lay out the fabrics, move her body carefully,
and wrap her in shimmering layers like an Egyptian queen.
She was so proud of us and proud of herself,
shrouded in beauty and ready for travel.

We carried her to newly dug earth,
sang and prayed some more,
and then lowered her into the ground.
We covered her luminous silk wrapping
with sacred gifts – blue corn, pearls, flowers, crystals,
and then faced the difficult moment when dirt was next.
Shovels in hand, we did it ourselves –
her 92 year old mother helped, the children helped.
Shovel by shovel, we filled the space above her body,
topping it off with worms from her beloved garden,
then wildflower seeds.

She lived in beauty and died in beauty
and now her body is surrounded by her beloved earth,
but she is everywhere.
We pray in her room to support her journey,
to support our journey.
We walk in her gardens, sing the songs she loved.
It is still happening over time –
she is less and less here, but we’ve walked with her the whole way.
One long unbroken thread,
her life woven with ours in love.

Margaret Barkley
March 21, 2011